Nuke me

Nuke me if its been too long since i last projected my weirdness online, my other work is a novel.
in other words, hello you!
still in gokarna, though boy have we been around, a bit, and heck, its a holy festival here that only happens once a year, but i want to talk about West Ham.
What has happened to the Irons? Five wins on the trot, good as gold, then Man u slip one past us, middlesborough hold in the FA cup and Bolton, a team i personally abhor (no offence) beat us in the only stadium in Britain named after a shoe.
Anyway, in india, Jane is with us now and having a rollicking good time, as is Jodie and I.
Shocking grammar. Electro. The novel is safe. Did I mention I'm writing a novel?
We've been to Panjim, an ex-portuguese ex-colony in Goa.
Wonderful place. Very good fish available.
Here's a list of animals we've spotted thus far:
Rats dolphins monkeys bats cows, Indians (of course that's a joke) dogs cats an elephant mosquitoes (I hate those bastards) crabs, fish...sorry i got bored of the list.
Nuke me.
But don't, seriously, I wouldn't survive. Nor could you.
I fell off a bicycle on the motorway in Panaji, straight into oncoming traffic. Pedalled off with a scratched knee and grazed hands and a lump in my thigh. Oh and a tiny piece of road in my face. Delightful.
The tans are coming along nicely, i've got through a pair of sandlas and replaced them with an unbroken in pauir of flipflops (an agonising mistake)
We've been swimming reading catch with a tennis ball,
JAne's leading the way in poker though jodie had a great run the other night. I've been winning the categories game and the name game fell flat. Everything else is great.

Moonlight music festival

A couple of days ago i woke up on a rocky hilltop. A small crowd shared the hilltop with me and jodie was huddled at my side trying to get comfortable amongst the stones.

Directly below us was a temple. The courtyard had been converted into a stage.

For the past ten hours bands have played and sung traditional indian music, interupted only by free food - which i didn't have (Grossout warning: I'd been pissing shit for the past few days and still felt tender) - and free chai, the urn of which i gladly emptied.

Still two hours to go.

Above us the incandescant moon lorded it over the skies, blotting out the stars for a vast radius.

At the perimeter of the moon's dominance, stars (and our little cousin red mars) can be seen and so too the human lights of habitation.

Only following these lights can i grasp how far below us they are, spread across hills of jungle that undulate beneath our holy mountain, plunging ten thousand feet to the road we took to get here.

The blog has landed

Three airports, two planes, two trains, twelve taxis, one rickshaw and a moped later me and Jodie are in Kudle Beach, kicking the surf's ass. I worked out why we yawn - when you're tired, ready to sleep, you're vulnerable - a show of teeth before sleep should scare off anyone tempted to eat you...and its contagious because in a community a lot of teeth is always better than a few.
I could be wrong.
I gave a T-shirt away to a kid the other day, and it made me happy. Momentarily.
Its great here guys, I won't lie.
Our first night in Mumbai we stayed in a hotel that was still under construction, and that was lovely. We've shot some footage and that will be online soon...can't wait can ya? You have to.
My favourite signs so far were in Mumbai - most cars bear horn ok please on the back or even simpler blow ok please. The government strikes back with a silent city is a good city...I don't know who will win that war but its sure to be a corker.
Second favourite was in Asia's busiest train station - a ticket from a tout is a ticket to jail.
Superb.
It's not all about signs though, we rented a scooter in Patnam beach and i bloody loved it. Jodie drove first before i started to feel a little emasculated and asked for a turn. The engine was switched off - and we couldn't work out how to fire it up again. A local helped us and we were off, zooming up and down mountains, round bendy roads, dodging past cyclists buses cars and other less hardy mopeders...Jodie was very encouraging, knowing it was my first drive, saying stuff like slow right down, glen not so fast, brake when you go round a corner, and my personal favourite i feel very tense.
All jolly good clean innocent fun.
Now i'm in a bloody internet cafe wondering where all my weed went and saying no to paradise, for ten minutes at least.
That's it for now, so thanks, and i'll try to make the next one better. If i don't email you personally just find me on chessworld.net and hopefully i won't lose by default.
tata